Wednesday, October 22, 2014

miss nostalgic.

My dear friends, tonight I catch a red eye to Tennessee. I'm ecstatic. It's the second time for me to return home since I left over a year ago. The main reason is to say goodbye to the home I was born and raised in (*house hasn't sold yet but is expected to very soon) and to help my mom drive her car out to Utah. Oh, how it will be extremely hard to say goodbye to my house. It's not just a house, it's the only one I ever lived in. Those walls hold memories from the beginning, from before my parents' divorce. It holds happiness and grief. Easy bake ovens and songs sung by the whole family. Midnight piano pounding and yelling to stop. The same story told to me night after night as a little girl from my dad when he got lost as a kid. The smell of a new dessert being made on the daily by my mom. The insane amount of holiday decorations in our garage. Endless laughter. The snickers from my brother and I as we stole candy from my mom's closet and were always caught. The token egg from the Easter egg scavenger hunt that was never found. The Christmas garland that stayed up all year long. My closet door covered in stickers that I swore I would take with me when the end came. The presents I found for my upcoming birthday because my mom wasn't good at hiding and I was too good at seeking. The yellow then lavender walls in my room. The hugs and never-ending love.

Wow, I could go on forever. But let's stop the waterworks for me. Unfortunately, when I get there, there won't be anything left in the house. All of the items have been moved out. So, I'll be walking through a ghost house. If you can't tell, I'm pretty nostalgic. And man, is this gonna be hard.

Can't we just do it all over again? I took it for granted this first time around.

Tennessee will always be my home, though I have no trace of an accent to show it. But once that house isn't mine, I will feel homeless until I create my own family. There is something to say about moving forward, but I'm not very happy about it. :) It's okay, I'll live. And one day, I'll drive by with my kids and relive all of the memories.

So, to Tennessee I go, a little teary-eyed and excited.

Below is amazing memories overload. (sorry in advance)
Chillin with my bros so long ago. Chad, Ben, & Casey
The view from my huge window in my room.
me! Look at that 90's outfit.
EVERY year, the family would be gathered to bring the cake with candles lit and a video camera rolling to sing to the birthday boy/girl.
Even as we grew older, we would always color eggs.
The Truman Whole Wheat Waffles. Literally the best meal ever.
Pure excitement and joy when I was accepted to FIT in NYC, but had to turn it down.
The Christmas sweaters! My mom had millions and vests for every holiday.
Probably one of the best things I've ever made: Samoa Cake. (takes 3 hours!) 
There was always impromptu dancing in the kitchen. 
Desserts..all of the time..I have the biggest sweet tooth in the world. Thanks, Mom.
Easter Morning post-inhouse-egg hunt
We always had a party at mi casa. Here, I was hosting a Valentine's party my sophomore year of high school.
I used to own a vintage online store. Made a few thousand bucks in a summer.
Celebrating my 17th birthday with some close friends. 
Preparing for Thanksgiving.
I always tried to find places to take pictures around my house. Never really worked.
I loved this Cracker Barrel date with my momma. And those biscuits are the best. 
Setting up the Christmas tree with Chad, my bro & his wife, Catherine.
My 16th birthday was a 40's/50's theme. We watched the Notebook...hahahaha.
My brother, Casey always wanted to hang in my room. 
Not at my house, but this is me and my Dad. 
Post making Monster cookies. I'm telling you, there was more dessert than dinner at my house.
This picture makes me smile. I knew how to smile so readily even before I was one thanks to the #1 Photographer Mom.
I was the QUEEN of Goodwill. I'm a treasure hunter. How I miss it. D.I. in Utah just isn't the same.
The best cafe by my house, Chef's Market. Nothing compares to that all-you-can-eat buffet.
My dear friend, Matthew and I before we headed out to my senior prom on my staircase.
Every holiday was celebrated to the utmost. 
My hair was 10,000x better in Tennessee, WHY?
I love those pretty boys so much. 
My mom made me that pimpin sweater. Also that pose? Haha!
I think I was a different kind of witch for 5 years in a row.
This is part of the front yard of my house. It's so lush and green! I miss it!! 
My biggest support. Yeah, I played sports!
My front porch, always perfectly decorated, always where we took family pictures.

So many memories! Thanks for reading! 

Monday, October 20, 2014

take it all in.

top-Macy's, skirt-Anthropologie, shoes-Francesca's, bag-Fossil 

photos by Mailee Yang

Life has endless opportunity and endless wonder if we just seek it out. Man, do I love exploring these beautiful mountains and scenery.  This was up in Sundance on a cold morning. Breathtaking views that bring you peace.

Saturday, October 18, 2014

neutral turtle.


turtleneck-Forever 21, pants-old, hat-Forever 21, booties-Forever 21, purse-Kohl's, sunglasses- Shop Sosie

photos by Mailee Yang

If I could wear hats every day, I would. Less upkeep with my hair and it just completes a look. I love this simple look of all neutrals. Turtlenecks are back in. 
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My thoughts lately:


 I often feel I'm so far behind in many aspects of my life. But then I have to remind myself, I'm only beginning, only 19. I can't compare my beginning to someone else's middle or even end. I can only compare yesterday to today and see if I have improved.

Comparison is the thief of joy. No one has the same talents or personality as you. You have your own unique role to fulfill. 

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

miss nostalgic.

My dear friends, tonight I catch a red eye to Tennessee. I'm ecstatic. It's the second time for me to return home since I left over a year ago. The main reason is to say goodbye to the home I was born and raised in (*house hasn't sold yet but is expected to very soon) and to help my mom drive her car out to Utah. Oh, how it will be extremely hard to say goodbye to my house. It's not just a house, it's the only one I ever lived in. Those walls hold memories from the beginning, from before my parents' divorce. It holds happiness and grief. Easy bake ovens and songs sung by the whole family. Midnight piano pounding and yelling to stop. The same story told to me night after night as a little girl from my dad when he got lost as a kid. The smell of a new dessert being made on the daily by my mom. The insane amount of holiday decorations in our garage. Endless laughter. The snickers from my brother and I as we stole candy from my mom's closet and were always caught. The token egg from the Easter egg scavenger hunt that was never found. The Christmas garland that stayed up all year long. My closet door covered in stickers that I swore I would take with me when the end came. The presents I found for my upcoming birthday because my mom wasn't good at hiding and I was too good at seeking. The yellow then lavender walls in my room. The hugs and never-ending love.

Wow, I could go on forever. But let's stop the waterworks for me. Unfortunately, when I get there, there won't be anything left in the house. All of the items have been moved out. So, I'll be walking through a ghost house. If you can't tell, I'm pretty nostalgic. And man, is this gonna be hard.

Can't we just do it all over again? I took it for granted this first time around.

Tennessee will always be my home, though I have no trace of an accent to show it. But once that house isn't mine, I will feel homeless until I create my own family. There is something to say about moving forward, but I'm not very happy about it. :) It's okay, I'll live. And one day, I'll drive by with my kids and relive all of the memories.

So, to Tennessee I go, a little teary-eyed and excited.

Below is amazing memories overload. (sorry in advance)
Chillin with my bros so long ago. Chad, Ben, & Casey
The view from my huge window in my room.
me! Look at that 90's outfit.
EVERY year, the family would be gathered to bring the cake with candles lit and a video camera rolling to sing to the birthday boy/girl.
Even as we grew older, we would always color eggs.
The Truman Whole Wheat Waffles. Literally the best meal ever.
Pure excitement and joy when I was accepted to FIT in NYC, but had to turn it down.
The Christmas sweaters! My mom had millions and vests for every holiday.
Probably one of the best things I've ever made: Samoa Cake. (takes 3 hours!) 
There was always impromptu dancing in the kitchen. 
Desserts..all of the time..I have the biggest sweet tooth in the world. Thanks, Mom.
Easter Morning post-inhouse-egg hunt
We always had a party at mi casa. Here, I was hosting a Valentine's party my sophomore year of high school.
I used to own a vintage online store. Made a few thousand bucks in a summer.
Celebrating my 17th birthday with some close friends. 
Preparing for Thanksgiving.
I always tried to find places to take pictures around my house. Never really worked.
I loved this Cracker Barrel date with my momma. And those biscuits are the best. 
Setting up the Christmas tree with Chad, my bro & his wife, Catherine.
My 16th birthday was a 40's/50's theme. We watched the Notebook...hahahaha.
My brother, Casey always wanted to hang in my room. 
Not at my house, but this is me and my Dad. 
Post making Monster cookies. I'm telling you, there was more dessert than dinner at my house.
This picture makes me smile. I knew how to smile so readily even before I was one thanks to the #1 Photographer Mom.
I was the QUEEN of Goodwill. I'm a treasure hunter. How I miss it. D.I. in Utah just isn't the same.
The best cafe by my house, Chef's Market. Nothing compares to that all-you-can-eat buffet.
My dear friend, Matthew and I before we headed out to my senior prom on my staircase.
Every holiday was celebrated to the utmost. 
My hair was 10,000x better in Tennessee, WHY?
I love those pretty boys so much. 
My mom made me that pimpin sweater. Also that pose? Haha!
I think I was a different kind of witch for 5 years in a row.
This is part of the front yard of my house. It's so lush and green! I miss it!! 
My biggest support. Yeah, I played sports!
My front porch, always perfectly decorated, always where we took family pictures.

So many memories! Thanks for reading! 

Monday, October 20, 2014

take it all in.

top-Macy's, skirt-Anthropologie, shoes-Francesca's, bag-Fossil 

photos by Mailee Yang

Life has endless opportunity and endless wonder if we just seek it out. Man, do I love exploring these beautiful mountains and scenery.  This was up in Sundance on a cold morning. Breathtaking views that bring you peace.

Saturday, October 18, 2014

neutral turtle.


turtleneck-Forever 21, pants-old, hat-Forever 21, booties-Forever 21, purse-Kohl's, sunglasses- Shop Sosie

photos by Mailee Yang

If I could wear hats every day, I would. Less upkeep with my hair and it just completes a look. I love this simple look of all neutrals. Turtlenecks are back in. 
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My thoughts lately:


 I often feel I'm so far behind in many aspects of my life. But then I have to remind myself, I'm only beginning, only 19. I can't compare my beginning to someone else's middle or even end. I can only compare yesterday to today and see if I have improved.

Comparison is the thief of joy. No one has the same talents or personality as you. You have your own unique role to fulfill.